简单爱?

it was fine at first. dinner at new york new york at hub. with my hot plate tomato spaghetti with dory and his chicken chop baked rice plus chocolate ice cream waffle..

but.

u think u did everything for me. i think i did everything for u. but we both dun see wat we have done for each other.

maybe all along i was wrong. double standards. maybe i wanted too much.

i never tot i'll say this. but after this r/s, i dun think i'll get into another one ever again.

after wat has happened so far. and looking at past history. i really dun wan to face all these again.

i always wanted my own family. always tot one day, someone will sweep me off my feet jus like wat happen in those stories i love. but maybe i really expect too much.

after so much had happened, i think it's so much better to be alone. no need to explain ur actions to anyone. u can do watever u wan w/o worrying. though it might get lonely at times. maybe it's a small price to pay for wat u get in return.

听过周杰伦的<简单爱>吗?
quoted from a gd fren of mine:
"周杰伦，你骗我。
因为爱不能够永远单纯没有悲哀。爱也不可以简简单单没有伤害。所以根本没有简单爱。"

and wat's e best thing to distract myself from all these? and make me stop thinking and getting upset? MUG like hell!

as if.

rotten

当爱成了习惯， 该怎么办？
当爱成了依赖， 该怎么办？
习惯，依赖与爱似乎只是一线之差。
我怎么知道怎么分别？

sometimes, i really dunno. am i really askin for too much? e last 2 times, was cos i nv paid enuf attention. and now, i'm giving too much attention? or am i askin so much more in return? in e morning, when i need u, i hesitate twice to msg u. i dunno wat u doin, whether u r slping or nt. i dun dare to disturb u.

是不是我们爱得太快？还是我始终都没了解你？

i always tot education status is nt impt. always believe in that. but.. 进取心？

maybe the problem lies in me. u always knew wat u wanted. i never know. sometimes, i feel i'm like dragging my feet in the sand.

the fierce competition in sch, fyp, home matters. not knowin wat will happen next. having no idea whether u can make it or not. it's all making me damn exhausted. i wan to turn around to find someone to lean to, but sometimes it's nt there.

sleeping at weird timings. cant believe i'm so tired. and waking up at weird timings. how much studying, how much hard work must i put in den will be enuf?

at e end of e day, all i wan is someone who can listen to me share what happen during e day.

ok, fine. i give up. it's jus me. one of those super rotten days.

loves

why not pink?
cos he says this one nicer :)

Don't Go Away- By2

it had been an eventful, fab, great oct!
meet-ups, gatherings, shopping!
one of the best mths this yr! :D

random

it was great to see her again. and to talk over hot chocolate abt stuff. we had a great laugh over lots. i'm glad that she shared some of my tots which means it wasnt jus me. who knows wat will happen tml. too passive? maybe. i'm hoping for surprises. :) but maybe it had always been only me.

but i will be happy, no matter wat :)

jus back frm watching poker king <扑克王> starring 古天乐 with him at bishan! i think i watched practically every single one of his shows this yr! 帅哥而戏又演得好, 值得支持！:)

the girl

Meeting the girl tml.. who else? haha.

thus, i'm goin to wake up damn early like 6am.. haha. so i can go sch early and finish my stuff early so that i can meet her.. shop, shop, walk, walk, talk, talk, gossip, gossip. LOL.

feels kinda of weird w/o tuitions nowadays. so used to rushin tt sometimes i feel a bit meaningless now. haha. i must be mad. starting the current one again next mth i guess and alr booked to continue with one of my girls once i grad next yr. haven been withdrawin money for mths, only been puttin in. since there was always cash on hand frm tuition. nt very happy tt i have to draw money now. heartache. haha.

jellies

am still upset abt it. i do not wan to know how it will affect my CAP. i think it might be a C or D. damn. all i wan is jus a B, minimum B-..

but thank you to those who were there. still, it's nt very nice to whine when they have loads of assignments and reports to rush. but den again, they didnt fail tt bloody hell damn test. bah.

i think a few days of crying n self-blaming will help. though i know it doesnt change anything. oh well, i jus like to cry and wallow in self-pity.

lunch with my 儿子 did help a bit. and the jellies from e jap food make me feel slightly better.

cant bear to eat them

i love traffic light colours

the simplest thing can cheer me up! :)